My coworker commented recently that she felt my husband was taking on some of my symptoms and the longer I thought about it I was convinced she was correct. I'd heard of this phenomenon of "sympathy weight" gained by the father during a woman's pregnancy, but I think we're experiencing another phenomenon. I think my husband is pregnant too, emotionally.
Well before I discovered I was pregnant, I noticed my husband was having mood swings and eating at odd times of the day and night. Normally a trip to the gym would help, but he had a hard time even doing that. After it was confirmed that I was indeed expecting, he went into this "prepartum" depression, but for men.
He was unmotivated, he had trouble sleeping at all times of the day and night. He ate everything in the house that wasn't stapled down. He would do weird-craving things like eating all the M&M's out of the trial mix I bought. He asks for milkshakes now and grills burgers at 1:00 am well after we've already eaten dinner. He's clingy and touchy-feely, which he has NEVER been at any time in our relationship. He calls me at work in the middle of the day, on my work phone just to ask how I'm doing, which just melted my heart I must say. It's sort of sweet to see him this vulnerable and it's also strange. I chalk up most of it to the nervousness that we are about to be parents soon and really haven't had that much prep-time, so I try to include him in all the processes so he'll know this is a joint effort we are going through together. Little did I know just how much.
I am certainly monitoring this behaviour as evidenced by this blog and I'm really in awe of it because I'm finally seeing the teddy bear side of him that likes to peak it's head out once in a while. I cannot wait to see him with the baby once she's here.
As far as any actual sympathy weight, he hasn't actually gained any yet as I really haven't myself, but I believe he feels the weight of the pregnancy and fatherhood like a I feel this fetus. He is taking it well seeing that we've only known about the pregnancy for about 30 days now. In March we're scheduled to take a few birthing classes together, you know pillows and breathing. That should be fun.
Next blog: Bodily changes, I promise not to get too graphic.
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I think this is so wonderful. Pregnancy is an extremely powerful opportunity for a couple to bond. You two have come together and truly have become one via the child you have created. I know that my one of my primary reasoning for lamenting the decision to limit our children to 4 was I craved to have that pregnancy relationship with my husband again. My husband shared every single experience that I had while expecting and nursing. His involvement was priceless, I have never been so nurtured nor has any other experiences been so shared. Yes, he gained major sympathy; however, I craved certain smells while pregnant so I was cooking around the clock. Essentially, you both are pregnant; pregnant with your heir and boundless opportunities for joy that your little girl will bring to your lives. Enjoy the experience
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